Friday, December 01, 2006
L is for Lawn Ornament!
Bert started collecting lawn ornaments a few years ago. He didn't really mean too - it just kind of worked out that way. He happened to pick up a plastic pink flamingo when visiting some relatives in Florida. Somehow folks got the notion that bert was starting a collection. Heck, all he wanted was a little splash of color next to the mailbox. But before he knew it, people started bringing him lawn ornaments every time they dropped by to see him. Bert isn't a particularly friendly guy, but he's not the kind of guy who is going to be rude to someone who goes to the trouble of giving him a gift, either. So he puts them up. He tries to find an appropriate spot for each new addition, someplace where the giver of the gift is sure to see it when they come around again. This of course compounds the problem. Once they see how much he liked the last lawn ornament, they feel downright obligated to bring Bert another one next time. The truth is that some of Bert's friends think he has become a little obsessive about the whole lawn ornament thing. Bert is kind of half hoping for a tornado or flood or something so he can have an excuse to clean up the yard.
Posted by Jeff Cohen at 8:11 AM