M is for Mullet!

I have to tell you that I have struggled to find just the right concept for a few of these pieces. Not this time! I have known that M was for mullet for weeks. I mean, it's the mullet, for crying out loud! The hair style to end all hair styles! I did extensive internet research to find just the right mullet for this painting. The mullet, also known as "hockey hair" and "professional wrestler hair," comes in many varieties. There are rat tail mullets, shaved top mullets, mohawk mullets and many, many other variations. But they all have one thing in common: they are short on top and long in the back. What is it about this amazing hairstyle that makes people in certain segments of our society continue to keep it alive? God only knows. I just know I had to commemorate it with this painting.

If you are sporting a mullet of your own, and you get the impression that I am ridiculing you and those of your ilk for your hair style, let me just say...what were you thinking? Get a haircut!

L is for Lawn Ornament!

Bert started collecting lawn ornaments a few years ago. He didn't really mean too - it just kind of worked out that way. He happened to pick up a plastic pink flamingo when visiting some relatives in Florida. Somehow folks got the notion that bert was starting a collection. Heck, all he wanted was a little splash of color next to the mailbox. But before he knew it, people started bringing him lawn ornaments every time they dropped by to see him. Bert isn't a particularly friendly guy, but he's not the kind of guy who is going to be rude to someone who goes to the trouble of giving him a gift, either. So he puts them up. He tries to find an appropriate spot for each new addition, someplace where the giver of the gift is sure to see it when they come around again. This of course compounds the problem. Once they see how much he liked the last lawn ornament, they feel downright obligated to bring Bert another one next time. The truth is that some of Bert's friends think he has become a little obsessive about the whole lawn ornament thing. Bert is kind of half hoping for a tornado or flood or something so he can have an excuse to clean up the yard.

K is for Koala!

For "K" I have chosen "K is for Koala." An evil, bloodthirsty, mutant, giant koala with laser beam eyes.

J is for Jubilation!

You know those annoying sweepstakes things you get in the mail - the ones that are designed to make you think you have won something? You ever wonder what kind of idiot would actually fall for such a pathetic ruse? This is her! Carol has received just such a notice, and she is beside herself with joy. She lifts her eyes and right hand to heaven in praise and thanks, while her left hand clutches the precious document of her salvation to her bosom. She's already making plans for the money she thinks she has won. Let's just hope she doesn't sign any contracts before her husband comes home and points out the fine print. Then again, he's pretty dumb too! They might be buying a houseboat this weekend.